Wednesday was supposed to be a day of Discovery - the Space Shuttle Discovery that is. The venerable old space boat was supposed to be launched Wednesday night for another yawner of a mission to the International Space Station. But once again the age of the old bird began to show, and NASA had to cancel the launch for now.

There are only ten shuttle missions left on the schedule for the three remaining space vehicles that haven’t already blown themselves to bits in a vivid display of smoke and flame. The technology being used to put the shuttle into orbit is now 30 years old. Parts are getting harder and harder to find - try locating a taillight cover for a Ford Pinto and you get the general idea. Sooner or later, it’s going to be a big problem trying to find enough Evel Knievel wannabes willing to strap themselves into those technological dinosaurs. After all, it’s not very heroic to be done in by a piece of foam or a lousy rubber o-ring.

Age seems to be the main issue with NASA these days. It seems like the whole U.S. space program has become like one long running joke about problems faced by old men. Not only are the shuttles themselves old and cranky, but the technical gurus running the program are graybeards too - leftover Grandpa Geeks from the technical stone age.  And and all the delays seem to be centered around the kind of issues facing the elderly.

For example, Discovery was supposed to take off into the wild blue yonder a month ago, but that launch was scrubbed due to a problem with a flow control valve. Yeah, that flow control stuff seems to be a common problem among older dudes. And this most recent delay is apparently due to a leak in a Hydrogen line. Problems with flow, leaking, dribbling - are we seeing a urological pattern here? This Hydrogen line jazz is a real show stopper though - if you try to launch the shuttle with Hydrogen leaking all over the place, you’re risking an explosion that would make Hiroshima look like a wet match. So the Graybeard Geeks decided to cancel the show for now until they can be sure they won’t blow half of eastern Florida to kingdom come.

Even Discovery’s mission itself is full of old man similarities. The shuttle is supposed to be delivering a Truss for the International Space Station that will provide a bit more support for the old habitat. I’m serious - you can’t make this stuff up. They are also bringing along parts to repair the fancy system that converts urine into drinking water. See? Another pee problem! They say it’s the plumbing that always goes first.

What NASA needs is some kind of Viagra for the Shuttle Program. Something you drop into the fuel system to make sure you can get the damned thing up on launch day. You know, one of those new pills that give you a 48-hour window in which to - err, launch - just in case the weather doesn’t cooperate or something. We’re getting to the end of the program here, and our national dignity depends on our ability to - err, perform - on schedule. So let’s do whatever it takes to git ‘er done.